County Rumored to Consider New “Waterfront” Property Tax Assessment

With municipalities across Virginia scrambling to find new sources of local tax revenue County officials are denying rumors that a new “waterfront” property tax is being considered for previously land-locked properties. Whether local officials will resist the urge to increase property valuations on homes and farms that have gained river and lake-front access, literally overnight, remains to be seen.

Citizens whose properties have not been impacted by “rising tides” are lauding local officials for considering ways to financially “leverage” the 4.5 inches of rain that has soaked the area since Friday morning. Over the last three days Clarke has seen the formation of dozens of new lakes and at least one new river flowing north to south across Old Charles Town Road. “While many counties across the country are “underwater” financially, we see this as a way to “keep our heads above water” until real estate values recover” said one local official who asked to remain anonymous.

Through a stroke of sheer good fortune Clarke County Schools will not be in session on Monday easing concerns that students have access to personal floatation devices before leaving their homes. However, school officials are rumored to be considering a new “green” transportation plan that would employ a “gondola-like” water taxi system leveraging the County’s many new canals and deep-water ports.

In a related story, officials are also denying plans to launch a major tourism campaign “re-packaging” Clarke as the “Venice of Virginia”. Further details on this developing story, as well as coverage of news, sports and life in Clarke County, Virginia, are always available at your hometown news source, ClarkeDailyNews.com

Comments

  1. Bond, James Bond says:

    I wonder if the county farmers have considered rice as a new cash crop.

    Also, there have been unconfirmed sitings of a serpent-like creature locally known as the Locke Store Monster.

  2. moose man says:

    Is this a serious article? Have these “rumors” legitimate basis in fact?

    • Ed Leonard says:

      The “Waterfront Property Tax” story is fictional. Thanks for your interest in the Clarke Daily News – Ed Leonard